She's Getting Married

She's getting married, my baby girl. She has been a mom for nine years. A woman before her time, yet somehow it didn't taint her. It hasn't made her bitter to give up her childhood it has made her gentle, strong, loving, proud, beautiful, generous....... She has done all the things that a wife and mother do all without the bonds of marriage. Now in just over a month she will become a wife. Brian's wife. A boy who in his own right became a man too early, his own childhood haulted, a father and a boy all at the same time. He is a good man full of integrity. I love him as my own and I am proud of this man. But this is about my little girl, my Jazzie. We watched again for the third time today Mama Mia. I spent the entire movie crying today. I think for the first time it hit me that she is getting married. She and Brian have been together thirteen years and for the last nine they have shared a home. They have beautiful children and together they work hard to make a happy family. I look at her and I see a little girl full of life. I look at her and I know she is a woman. As we plan this long awaited day I see the confidence she once had coming back to her I see the joy in her face and I can feel the worth she feels in herself. You see in these last few years I have watched as this girl full of joy has shrunk back from herself and lost faith in who she was. I didn't know what to do for her. I know it is something women go through. That feeling of what am I here for? That feeling of thinking I am not good enough. I am not as pretty as I once was. I am tired. I am trying and no one notices. Mom, mom, mom, mom.......... Who am I? Where is Jazzie... She is right here my sweet girl, she never left you. I wish she could see herself through my eyes. I am in awe of her. She is a great mom. Her children are happy and they know they are loved. She is a good wife (I can't say the word girlfriend it just doesn't apply). She is a good friend. She is generous and always willing to help anyone who needs it. I see her wrestling a bit with her spirituality and growing into a woman who walks with the Lord and knows the importance of Christ in her life. But mostly what I see when I look at her is my little girl with her twinkly eyes. The simple things make her happy and she knows that the most important things in life are the small ones. Those perfect moments when your soul and surroundings are in harmony and all is well in the world. She is a woman who takes on life without fear, but still calls her mom everyday. I still want to make the world a safe place for her I want to hold her on my lap and let her know Mommy's got you baby girl and I will never let anything bad happen to you but, I know we are way past that. She has taught me so much about love and grace and mercy and what being a mom is all about. I guess if I could say anything to her at this time in her life it wouldn't be any words of wisdom about how to be the best wife you can be, nope , not even close to that, I would tell her thank you. Thank you for being my daughter, my friend, my teacher. Thank you Jazzie, for being you and for letting me everyday share your life with you. Thank you Jazzie for being you.